i will give you $100

I feel like starting anew. I changed my blog name last night after deliberating how I'm going to make the plan to rid of debt stick. I have tried and tried over the last 15 months with not much improvement. We actually have more debt than when I started this blog. I didn't get smart at all.

So I need more motivation. I need to be accountable. I need to focus, tight my belt some more, literally not want to buy anything that's not essential. It's going to be hard after posting all those home improvements we'd like to do.

But I am sick of debt. Just really sick of it. I don't like what it does to me mentally. I don't like what it does to my relationship with J. I have been resentful of the causes of our debt that even if I know part of it was my fault, I just blame the environment that sucked me into debt. It's like I want the world to look after my wellbeing and say "Oh, debt is bad for you so let's not get you into it, shall we?"

Tough. Nobody would tell me that except for my father and mother. With that said, I'm a bit sad to realize how much I've held on to being taken care of like that. I'm an adult now and I'm the parent this time. I have to take care of myself and be that caring parent to my child. I think I just need to stop wanting to be taken care of and just moved on to being debt free.

So, what's with the new title? Well, I thought it would be a great idea to pledge $100 NZD to whoever can closely guess how much consumer debt will be left unpaid by New Year's Eve 2009.

We currently have $19,006.05! You can read my previous blogs if you want to get a better feel for my personality, tendencies, goals, failures, plans, what have you. I will only pay via Paypal and all those who make a guess will be posted on the side panel. You can only make a guess once. I don't have a due date for guestimates yet. I'm leaning towards May 1st. I might put up a progress bar or simply report on how much debt is still left on a fortnightly basis at the least.

So, make a guess because you might just earn yourself $100 NZD.